Episode 65: Not My Slave by Derek L. Palmer
Nothing could be worse than being obsessively infatuated with a girl who doesn’t like you back. If only there was a way to make these unwanted romantic feelings go away…
Also, Rish and Big talk about unromantic subjects like unnecessary love letters, bitterness, following someone to Canada, and Zelda Rubinstein.
Special thanks to Norm Sherman for lending his voice to today’s episode.
Right click HERE to download the episode, select Save Link As, and save the file to your hard drive.
http://media.libsyn.com/media/dunesteef/Dunesteef_65_Not_My_Slave_by_Derek_L_Palmer.mp3%20bloopers
Related Links:
The Drabblecast
Music in today’s episode was Dance Of The Fairies by Zero-Project.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
The Dunesteef Audio Fiction Magazine 
February 21, 2010 at 9:55 am
Haven’t listened yet, but I groaned when I saw how quickly the episode downloaded. Gotten really spoiled with the longer episodes that have been coming lately!
February 22, 2010 at 8:10 am
STORY: In the beginning it started to feel like it was going on too long before we got to any action — like, I expected a couple of minutes of fable-talk before the story actually started. Then I realized it was a fable, and it was okay. If anything, the science fell down a little because the doctor took away more than just “love”. I mean, I like cream soda, sure, but even if I couldn’t love someone I could still enjoy a cream soda. But not Vernor’s. That stuff tastes like ass.
PRODUCTION: I think the music beds ran a little too long under the story part, but otherwise good.
COMMENTARY:
* I’ve seen both Dave Coulier and Bob Saget do comedy. Saget is like the American Eddie Izzard — very funny, very quick, very dry. Coulier is… well, he was funny-ish, but kind of a douche when he got heckled. I’ve seen a lot of comedians, both big names and small, and Coulier was probably the douchiest. Though he did have a good bit about Shaquille O’Neal.
* Many of my stories about divorced couples are based on a specific woman in some way. Usually the same one.
* I think about an hour is fine for a podcast. Anything more and it becomes more than a round-trip commute to listen to. I know Big’s commute is quite long (he’s said so), so perhaps story length is different in his mind. Perhaps adding chapters to the files would be helpful — especially when you guys do spoiler-y chats, for those of us who don’t see a lot of movies but still want to listen to the show. However, if the story itself is longer than approximately 30 minutes, I would say the commentary’s total length should be no longer than the story — and that commentary would include story chat, associated banter, et al. The fear episodes were a little different because that was a special feature but otherwise… yeah.
February 22, 2010 at 9:51 am
I say make the banter as long as you want. It isn’t like everyone has the same listening schedule or habits, so every time you adjust to make one person happy, another will likely be disappointed. It’s like writing what you think someone else will like instead working from your own muse. You put all the work in, after all. Just do what you like, and don’t put too much stock in 1 or 2 emails from people who don’t represent the audience well.
February 22, 2010 at 3:22 pm
I sure hope I didn’t hear what I thought I heard before the story started. Tell me I didn’t hear that this is the LAST Dunesteef Audio Fiction Podcast!!
It sure sounded like that’s what you said, and the house echoed with my immediate, “NO!!” Uh, I like your podcast. Please keep it going.
And though I like the story to come sooner in the podcast, like you did with this one, it’s just because I like to get to it quickly, and then listen to you talk about it after it’s over, instead of before. Just me.
But bottom line is, it’s your thing. Do it your way, how you like it.
Thanks for another great podcast.
February 22, 2010 at 5:43 pm
First of all, I love the banter. In some ways, it can be more entertaining than the actual story. And you guys are the only ones I’m aware of that do this! It is a good thing. And even the Easter eggs could be longer. Off-mic you guys are hysterical.
Now, you might think that guys have cornered the market on one-sided relationships, so I offer you this embarrassing little story to let you know that you are not alone….
Level 1: When I was in high school, I dated this guy for several months. Let’s just call him DB. Well, DB decided that he was going to break up with me and that I was not to talk to him, contact him or even hang out with our mutual friends. I made this virtually impossible and basically refused to let him break up with me.
Level 2: So, girlfriend won’t ‘allow’ you to break up with her. Okay, so what does DB do? Drags out previous girlfriend and says that he’s still interested in her and wants to hang out with her. I still call him and talk with him daily, even though his friends tell me to back off.
Level 3: And this is where it sounds like your story– DB tells me that he’s going to undergo hypnosis to forget me and that I should just give up, since he won’t know who I am. The day after supposed hypnosis, I call him and reintroduce myself. He keeps up the act for over an hour and finally admits it was fake. I drive by his house a few nights in a row, decide that I’ve lost my mind and give up.
Yea, pretty bad. I’d be arrested if it happened now instead of 30 years ago.
February 22, 2010 at 10:55 pm
Mrs. CW Mouse, not to worry. It wasn’t really our final episode. We use that joke at least once every six months or so. One day it may actually be true, but when we hear comments like yours, it pushes that day further and further into the future.
Liz, funny story. I’ve often thought of how many things I did as a young man that would land me in jail these days, but back then was still thought of as simply good, clean fun or kids will be kids.
February 23, 2010 at 3:37 am
*WHEW!*
Thanks!
February 23, 2010 at 8:14 am
I listened to the episode last night. Shorter episode but extremely hilarious. You guys seemed to be having a great time.
I was listening late at night so I can’t remember all of the funny moments. But there was this one extremely funny moment where Rish has made an inappropriate joke (I think it was, ‘Daddy his scrotum had a zipper on it’) , and Big says, ‘uhhh…..’ and then Rish suddenly conveniently wonders, ‘how did we get onto that topic again?’ and changes the subject with cheerfully desperate rapidity. I was crying. And there seemed to be about 15 moments like that.
I was a big fan of Arrested Development. And sometimes your humor reminds me a little of theirs. Not exactly and not always.
i just wonder how you guys discovered that you could do this. Somehow you did. I’m glad you met and became friends.
oh, and the story was good too. (haha)
Just kidding, I really enjoyed the story. As bitter denouncements of the power and significance of love go, this one was right up my alley. The writing and the narration fit with the overall hilariousness of this episode.
I don’t know exactly how to describe this podcast. Fortunately I don’t have to. All I can say is it seems really serendipitous.
February 23, 2010 at 3:42 pm
I’m kind of ADD, so I like the shorter ones. And yeah, keep up the banter.
February 23, 2010 at 3:46 pm
When I first started listening to the Dunesteef, I did find the commentary a little long. But then I became addicted to it. Your detractor will come around … hopefully before he or she figures out how easy it is to hit the Next button. :D
February 25, 2010 at 4:52 am
Thanks to everyone’s kind words, I have decided to expand next week’s episode . . . by three minutes.
Consider yourselves warned.
February 25, 2010 at 1:40 pm
Woo-Hoo
February 26, 2010 at 11:32 am
I can’t believe the ritual sacrifices worked!
March 8, 2010 at 7:45 pm
Quirky and fun. The narration really made the story!